Cope pt. 2

by Adam and the Flood

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1.
The distance is a mystery from here to the sun there’s no end I can understand Mostly I think of you and me and how undone we’ve been since this all began I take my breaths in a soft light down the hall from the sleeping ones I love Too tired to dance or fight I stopped wearing a watch cause days are done Passing by the burn pile The stream sings for a while when the sky opens up and keeps us in I appreciate the way the tantrums fade when the music is played when our little devils grin you say there’s hope yet as long as we keep our noses dry in the cold wind something is happening I’m sure that something is happening Always knew I’d see the end of everything I know But I never thought it would happen…this…slow As long as I’m with you I’m ready to see the new day through Always knew I’d see the end of everything I know But I never thought it would happen…this…slow As long as I’m with you I’m ready to see the new day through Hard to explain to those that are floating not tethered to tiny fists You live for someone else while still trying to prove you exist crossing 40 feels different the daily creaks are a reminder I don’t take it for granted I see myself as a survivor Open to let downs reshaping the struggle picking up the pieces and redesigning the puzzle trouble is… age feels… like a planet around your neck the burden is certain to cause shame and regret especially when you’re trapped behind walls with people who say you’re hero But they don’t understand how fragile the makings are of an old rapper’s ego We need validation and tragedy we like to leave the lights on til we have to jumpstart the battery driving on Empty running the signs checking the screen til we losing our minds It’s in our blood to be connected to share the sinking the ship in open waters to be something for someone to be a legend to my daughter Damn Apocalypse can make you trip on all the wrong things Right now let’s forget we’re all on fire and ignore the shark fins Always knew I’d see the end of everything that I know But I never thought that it would happen…this…slow As long as I’m with you I’m ready to see the new day through As long as I’m with you I’m ready to see the new day through Always knew I’d see the end of everything that I know But I never thought that it would happen…this…slow As long as I’m with you I’m ready to see the new day through As long as I’m with you I’m ready to see the new day through
2.
I’ve been looking for a place to sleep a place to lie down my tired head I’d like to use your chest but i’ll settle for these feathers instead my eyes need to fall They need to land on the shore these waves won’t push me far they won’t push me from your door I’ve warmed cold floors bare bones dust and smoke It’s amazing all the ways in we cope So tired so vacant there’s a list long and wild I’ve been afraid to say it so I’ll carry silence with a smile I’ve been craving a place to rest a place with locks and forced hot air I’d like to use to your chest but I’m convinced that’s not fair I’ll spare you the story of how I’ll see the light at forty how I’ll be better shortly how I’ll be better at seeing glory That’s not us now that’s them then in brick house of sin mastering zen The future is wide awake with sharp teeth The past is fading flocks of sick sheep And my present is quietly pleading for sleep These are my choices wrapped in truths older than my clothes Packed in a suitcase with stickers and holes buried in a sleeping bag under flowers and failed goals with my greatest visions lost because the film was overexposed I’ve been circling trying to find a spot to land I’d spend a night at your feet but I’d love to fall into your hands I’ve been looking..looking for a place to rest Please let me settle down here I know you’re clean and I’m a mess I need a place to breath free the trouble from my lungs Sing me to sleep sweet bird I’ll be gone when morning comes
3.
My Love is gone Awake and left the bed The smell of stale coffee knocks around my head The pot is still warm There's barely any left Boy he vanished quick I feel exposed I haven't dressed My thoughts are dragging Working overtime to explain How someone could leave Without telling you their name He left a note The handwriting is perfect and severe This was a mistake I never should have slept here You remind me that i don't belong In a world that's soft and calm I sank to the floor Trying to find my form The quiet is real In the middle of the storm The first time is one to remember In a sea of moving space Lovers swimming circles Trying to keep up with the pace We were both running from something But your feet were starting to slow And i swear you were calling me from a life i already know Both standing at a red light Waiting for the sign to change A rat race all around us tired and deranged At first I looked away the resemblance was too strong Time had opened up And pulled you back to where you belong The minutes they fell away i'd fallen back in love Rescued from the ugly place that cages doves I almost said his name but you wouldn't have turned But to hear it across my lips was something i had earned My throat started to open my breath came rushing in The lock doors in our abandoned house were opening again I felt electric sorting through the way you would sing I felt electric Thinking about how you would sing to me The ones we leave behind Never leave our mind The ones that push ahead Never leave our bed The memories are a delicate thread That sew together every word we've said
4.
03:40
I'll hold you in my arms as the wind runs through your hair We're miles from the end and I don't seem to care You'll sing like you always do As roses fall from your lips I'll be hypnotized from your brown eyes and shaking hips Dance while I build a good home Hum while i split the firewood The walls will be made of glass so they'll see we're up to no good My heart is sinking toward the bottom  sinking toward the bottom of your sea It'll rest with the wrecks and pirate bones and i'll be in good company They'll say that we're tough pair that lived beyond our days Rebels with shallow graves and switchblades in our names I'd drive a million rusty nails to keep your ghosts away I'd pull every one of them out if you wanted them to stay We are the only ones left in the world with something left to prove Stay by my side when the road opens wide and i'll leave everything to you Rebels with shallow graves and switchblades in our names
5.
It’s hard to say which door you closed Window open left me exposed Hard to say what started the fight Maybe my neglect or lack of insight Hard to know why you never spoke up Why you were cold to my touch I’m sure there are answers hidden in between the inhale Under the tongue of a female Like you nothing is safe Could be pleasure and purpose Or could be razor blades Still I stay  Say the wrong thing and step back Give the sun time to shine Give your fists time to react I’ve been broken forever I’ve broken forever I’ve broken into treasure That can only be measured in measures And still the mess is attractive It’s what keeps us captive 
 
 I’ve been so committed to loving you If you ever leave I don’t know what I would do 
 
 And I don’t need to explain  Why I’m lost inside my own veins Blue to red but I won’t complain No matter how bad the pain takes my breath away You’ve been by my side By our bedside By and by and never wasted a moment alive Smoke by the wayside  Chamber hot from shots gone too high Truth is, gravity is a manipulation It’s the invisible chain that’s got me wasted Pulling the weight the world Pulling the voice of my girl Out of the air and onto the tape into a digital blur Waxing poetic about a pathetic aesthetic  You started a movement but never accepted the credit Now we watch the ceiling fan spin Pretend to put the 45 to the needle Drift away to the war drums of my people
6.
01:58
7.
We are pilgrims minus the ocean No kingdom to flee no golden road chosen Looking for brighter ways To navigate the maze And dance our way through The latest craze Cold shoulders under heat lamps Live wires pulsing with the amps Fighting through years of let downs Stress cracks the foundation You’re a god in a small town Addicted to the rush of salvation You’re a god in a small town Addicted to the rush of salvation You're your own worst enemy Black and white memory Graffiti on the tapestry Hollowed out legacy I don’t need to explain why I’m lost in my veins Looking for the heart to run the body and brain We complain when it’s to simple We complain when it's violence Trying to make martyrs out of molehills out of misery And pay our pennies to tyrants Alll night I’ve been running away from my dreams Looking to vanish in a smoke screen I’ve been seeing the same thing Fossils masquerading under human skin Fighting over scraps thrown out by them Losing a battle for nothing cause they never learned to ride on the wind Someday the clock stops and you become a legend Buried under grass with your sisters and your brethren And this is all for what? Tell me what we sacrificed to turn it up And this is all for what? Tell me what we sacrificed to turn it up Through and through i seek To ruin the abusers of the truth Armed with only a pen to rip a hole in the roof I'm an agent of my own recovery I'm an agent of my own recovery

about

Friends. Here is pt. 2 of the COPE project. These songs are meant to be the soundtrack to our collective heart. I've always written about relationships and how they shift and define what we become or what could have been. The foundation of everything is connection. Redemption and failure. Compassion and discovery. Together. I'm inspired by how we keep going even when we're broken. Thanks for going on the journey with me.

These mixes were brought to life by Mark "Exit" Goodchild and mastered by Tobe Donohue.

Art design by Carl Sutton from Deprived Anxiety/Siamese Apparel
Photography by Ben Conant

credits

released July 7, 2020

license

all rights reserved

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